The Unmasked Update

Have you ever noticed how eyes also smile? Faces covered, expressions hidden, smiles screened, I have learned to catch a smile in a eye and find a little joy in that, because seeing so many masked faces all the time can actually be quite depressing.

I woke up on Monday morning, ready to knock out my next post, a full six months since my last rambling. My strong 'responsibility' personality trait, feeling like I have let someone down? Silly really. I have had fleeting thoughts of writing something again, every now and then, but less motivation. Even as I type this, I am unsure it will even materialise into a post online, for you to read. It may just be a small outlet for me to share my thoughts, with myself. I remember now, that was actually one of my motivators for starting this blog. I am not a blogger type or a writer type, but always hopeful that the simple process of thinking, feeling and writing would be an outlet for processing, celebrating, mourning the different aspects of life here, and the recording of it, to reflect on one day in the future.

Since my last post (lamenting the pain and brokenness vividly evident in both the countries I get to call home) so much has happened. Protests in Hong Kong escalated to a point of crippling the city for a nearly two weeks in November. Schools closed, transport shut down, once bustling streets /shops/restaurants, turned into flames, tear gas, war zones by night.

Fortunately, December was a sweet breath of fresh air as the girls and I unveiled our undercover plot to visit our two newborn nieces in South Africa - a surprise to most of the family. Costly, but memory making that was worth every cent! The look on faces as we surprised family will be etched in my memory for a long time. Lots of family time, niece cuddles, early Christmas celebrations and we were back on a plane to be in Hong Kong, with Kev, for Christmas 2019.

January 7th marked the start of back to school for the remainder of the 2019/2020 school year. This is something I am still having to adjust to. Walking, public transport, sharing restaurant tables with strangers, burping out loud taxi drivers, small spaces, crowds, leg slapping before/after exercise (Pam and Dave, I still think of you guys every time I see this!), I am pretty familiar and comfortable with that all now. (Ok - except the out loud burping, without even a flinch). One other thing I am still getting used to is the December January period, because:
1. It's not the end /start of a new school year for the kids
2. It's not a big break/holiday time here. Christmas Day and Boxing Day, yes, but back to work on the 27th. Its funny how certain traditions get so entrenched. I need to re-orientate those expectations, because this year, it lead to a grumpy and ungracious wife and mom. "Hi! That's me."

I started January feeling disappointed, irritable and desperate need of some 'me time'. Not pampering, just a little head space and space to check my heart and fill my depleted soul. I was grateful for back to school and some good rhythms for everyone in the Murphy household. I started a bible reading plan and I was on top of it! High fives!

Well, that lasted two weeks.

Chinese New Year was early this year and schools closed for a week, as usual. It is such a great time of year in Hong Kong and something I was looking forward to, knowing we would soon be getting back into that normal routine I had been so grateful for, just a few weeks earlier.

Normal routine? Life has been so completely different from normal routine, since the start of Chinese New Year break on 23 January.

*Cough cough* (Covid-19)

Warning: Don't cough! Unless you want everyone to look at you like you have landed from another planet and then proceed to give you a wide birth.

We are now in our 7th week of schools being closed and 'normal routine' is this:

* The girls sleep a little later than usual (probably because they go to bed a little later than usual)
* I walk up the Peak quickly before Kev sets off to work. My breather, leg stretch, fresh air and heart orientation for the start of each new day.
* All seated at the table at 8:55am ready for class conference calls. My seven and five year olds, with ear phones in, devices fired up, chatting to their teacher and classmates who are now spread all over the world. This took me a while to get used to.

* English, Maths, IPC, Chinese, Bible, Jigsaw... and I completely ignore music and P.E, because who has time or energy for that?
* We aim to be logged off and complete by 12:30 each day.
* Lunch and GET OUT THE HOUSE

It sounds like we have this all waxed, but it took a few weeks and some serious attitude checks. I felt so let down and disappointed with the first school closure announcement and that was only a two week closure back then. Suddenly, I had to cross through all my calender appointments and dates, accept that I was going to be teacher stuck at home and digest the fact that Government had not only closed schools, but all public spaces, like libraries, swimming pools, playgrounds and other sports centres/facilities. Then, accept that many, many families were leaving Hong Kong - to do homeschool from their home country or even, a few families, forever. That is the point that broke me and I cried.

Two weeks of schools closures, grew to four weeks, onto six weeks and currently earliest resumption will be around end April - thats three months of no school and home school. Never having worn or even owned a mask, to realising we should probably get our hands on some, to facing the reality that there were none on the shelves, anywhere! Oh and then there was no rice or toilet paper, or anything remotely related to cleaning and hygiene for a good few weeks. Never has the sight of toilet paper on the shelf looked so good as it does these last few days.

It has been super challenging at times and an adjustment for sure, but around week three, my heart changed and I was able to see the benefit and count the blessing of this very unique time, that is hopefully never to be repeated (for the sake of the world and everyone that this has affected so personally). I spent some time with two different friends (and their kids) around that turning point who had such a positive attitude. Realistic about the challenges, but positive about the prospects. I realised how easy it can be to get sucked into a negative cycle, feeling sorry for yourself and feeding that with just more voices which ring to the same tune. Its horrible.

I find myself checking the news way too often. Checking new cases, the situation in Hong Kong, location of new infections in our area and more recently, following the spread around the globe. Despite the tragedy of it all and the seriousness of it, especially in those countries less equipped medically to hand the outbreak, I am so thankful for this time with the girls at home. They have been in a GREAT space, getting along like BFF'S and it feels like they are just growing up even more quickly before my eyes.

Before I was able to see the light of this situation, I did some major home school prep. Our living room turned into a classroom with white boards, schedules, plans, survival notes. That help me feel a little bit of control and sanity for the road ahead. One big white sheet on our front door is dedicated to 'Lets Celebrate' and at any time the girls can write something that they want to celebrate, from capturing (and releasing outside), the gecko that keeps us up at night sqwarking away in the aircon. I had no idea they make so much noise! Jen du Plessis - I still blame you for importing that guy from S.A to Hong Kong in your suitcase. He has multiplied and takes over our place after dark! To making homemade marmalade, eating spicy biltong from NZ and improving on our number reversals.

So, here is my 'Lets Celebrate' list:
* Days are slower and less frantic
* We have baked and cooked together loads
* Lego has come out (after about a year) and taken over our home - essentially, the are getting a chance to play and explore more things they haven't had a chance to touch in ages
* We have taken walks, breathed in fresh air, enjoyed the weather, which is still cool and lovely - wont be that way for too many more weeks.
* The girls have learnt to rollerblade - our Friday after (home)school activity.

* L&M's shop - on one such walk with friends, the kids discovered some rocks, shells, and what they call 'crystals' along the mountain path. We came home with a heavy load and unsure what to do with them, the kids decided to sell them. Of course, why didn't I think of that? Everyone wants to buy dusty old rocks and shells, right? Well these kids were way more creative, entrepreneurial and determined than me. We are in week 4 of L&M's shop (initials for both families surnames). The rocks have been cleaned, hand painted and every Tuesday you can find us with the shop setup on the sidewalk, beneath our apartment block. They are raking in the money, one $ at a time. Its the best watching these little personalities come out and all their different strengths come into play. They are saving up for a camp trip we plan to do soon...

* Camping  -  we are trying out our first Hong kong camping, just for one night, next weekend.
* We managed to get a short few days out of HK last week, as a family - ever so grateful for these kinds of opportunities in Asia! We swam loads, ate Phad Thai and Mango Sticky rice to our hearts content. Best of all, I didn't have to think about cooking, cleaning or washing at all for those few days.
* I am actually involved in, and aware of, what my girls are learning in school - and so there are so many opportunities to carry on the learning in normal life.  I keep catching myself saying 'see, this is exactly what we learnt about/spoke about/read about this morning'. It's so GREAT!
* We have Barbequed every second weekend. Yes, I now refer to Braai's as BBQ's. I will save the Braai word for when I am back in S.A, eating boerewors and sosaties. Ya, Nee? These have been some of our best moments of the last few weeks and I am so grateful for some friends who are always equally keen to get outdoors and jump to join us. *Cough cough* Mohuiddin's! (Oh wait! Dont cough!)

And so, we continue this new normal, knowing it wont last forever, but it may well last even past end April. I have been so aware that we have very little control over day to day and being a planner and someone who likes a bit of control, its been another reminder, to let go and trust. We are grateful for good health while we continue to be vigilent about hand washing, hand sanitizing etc etc, regularly when we are out. We wear masks when we have to take public transport or we are around more busy areas. We don't wear the laboratary goggles, plastic/rubber gloves and plastic rain coats we have spotted out and about. But we get out! I really think mental health could be one of the greatest danger of this time. Every day that the girls and I step out of our door for some afternoon activity, it feels so good!

And that is us, in Hong Kong, for such a time as this. Another time of being stretched, but seeing Gods Grace and Faithfulness abound. And maybe even one day I will choose this current normal as my new normal - home schooling the girls, slower life pace, more present. The appeal has grown on me in a big way...for one day when I don't live on the 24th floor of a high rise, in a 78sqm apartment.

 P.S On some days, eye smiles can be a little more tricky to spot ;)